Aberdeen, Scotland Family Photographer
This blog post is more for me than it is for anyone reading this. It's a place for me to allow some of my heart to pour out, to ease the pressure building inside of me that wants to burst free. I can never truly explain the intense yearning, pain and desire within me over the devastation and need in the world. I can never truly put into words the love and passion brewing within me to the point of overflowing. This post allows me to release some of that emotion so that in its place even more love mixed with anguish and joy and excitement and brokenness can grow.
My prayer lately (daily) has been, "Lord, where do you want to use me? Please use me. Use me to change this world." But more importantly my prayer has been, "Lord, break my heart. Break my heart daily and completely over the things in this world. Break me to the point where I HAVE to act and know that I'm ready to do something big. Break my heart into a million shattered pieces so that I can never see the world the same."
This prayer is so heavy. It's so big. With it comes many tears and the greatest responsibility I've ever known. Once your heart breaks over things it never used to, how can you come out the other end the same?
I know God's doing a big work in me. The things that I used to be able to gloss over and hide from are now finding their way into the very core of my heart. Things that I once used to tune out are now making me cry uncontrollable tears. The pain of this world is so heavy on my heart that I feel myself being crushed by the weight of it. But being crushed in a good way. In a way that makes my insides scream because I want so desperately to take every parentless child into my arms. I want so desperately to do something or be something so big that I affect the lives of thousands. I want so desperately to do and be better as a person through love and compassion. My whole being aches with the desire to accomplish something huge for this hurting world.
Anybody else out there feel me? My friends, where your heart is breaking over something or someone, use that for change. Where your heart is so full of overflowing love, use that to bless every single person around you. Where your heart is heavy with desire to be the change in the world, use that to make a small difference every day.
This message is a message for myself.
My absolute greatest desire for my life is to be used for something so big and amazing. I see people start non-profits in foreign countries - I want to be that. I see people change the lives of whole peoples - I want to be that. I see people love on their neighbors and everyone around them - I want to be that.
Friends, this world desperately, desperately needs you. And me. Let your heart break for this world.